Saturday, January 26, 2008

How to walk on my own in several small steps

1. React to shock.
2. Take something that takes away your anxieties. I started with Bach Flowers and B Complex. Moved to Parsiflora and Serotonin (5-HT). Moved to the xanax in drops I was given. Monday doctor. Because I need more help than I thought.
3. Listen to the same bloody music in loop in the ipod is forbiden. Ska, Roberto Carlos, Rap and the worst things in the world are the best, as long as they are happy and silly. You can't always get what you want, all magnetic fields and roxy music are banned. I have my own reasons.
4. Be with friends, even when I don't feel like it.
5. Keep myself busy as hell in the morning. It is the worst time of the day for me. Sometimes I just feel like disappearing.
5. Go to the gym and swim for hours. For someone who is smoking a pack of cigarettes a day there is nothing better. For someone who is 1m69cm and is weighting 47 kilos, it is a hope to gain some appetite and to stop drinking 10 teas a day and eating a bar of chocolate and nothing else.
6. Go to parties. Meet nice people. Or just people, anyway.
7. Stop hating myself and feeling guilty about everything.
8. And knowing that all I can do, or try to, is small steps at a time.

5 comments:

Pitucha said...

Parece-me uma boa receita.
Coragem.
Beijos

Sinapse said...

9. Travel
10. And then travel more, if you can

francisco carvalho said...

Ainda estava a zeros esta caixa de comentários quando escrevi aqui algumas palavras que, por problemas no meu velho Mac (que só agora liguei à rede), não chegaram a ver a luz...

Eu sei que pode parecer ridículo mas eu gostei muito deste 'post'. E o caderno aqui em baixo é maravilhoso.
:)
Não sei dizer mais.
Que faça sempre o sol em ti, menina Primavera!

e beijos

manamagana said...

se esta és mesmo tu, é verdadeiramente assustador!
Um abraço forte e apertado para ti miúda (abraços são das coisas mais reparadoras, acredita),
susana

Anonymous said...

Listen Beatles:

Help me if you can;

I'm felling down

...please, please help me